she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
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