Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
my brain is sober enough to have a conversation.. but my arms feel nice
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
Who knew you could get a drunk in public when jogging with your dog?
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
Randomize
