Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
I hate ducks.
What?
they're sketch. like squirrels. squirrels are sketch as fuck.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
best line ever after sex today..."wow, that was a porn-star sized load"
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
I would fuck him just for his dog
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
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