More tranny stories later!
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
It’s 830 am and the amount of Valentine’s Day snaps I’ve already seen makes me either want to vom, drink a bottle of wine, or buy chocolate
1000% No lie I was just looking on insta and was thinking about taking a bottle of wine to the face..
Good news!! I can adult!! 😂 turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement 😭😂
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
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