hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
I think I may have appendicitis, but the house is like two blocks from the hospital so I'm just gonna go and drink anyway.
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
Mom chose Thanksgiving to tell me the reason I am here is because she was too tired to give my dad a BJ and too drunk to make him pull out.
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
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