Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
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