? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
Dude at the bar last night came into the bathroom, drop kicked the stall open and start saying lines from happy Gilmore as he was shitting, "go in your home! Are you too good for your home?!"
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
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