He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
I'm concerned I may die tonight. All I've been told about my bday shenanigans is to bring slutty clothes, a bikini, tylenol, sunglasses and pjs. Tell me what the fuck is going on...now
bring lube too
i hate all of you
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
Randomize
