i think i have herpe
just one?
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
Randomize
