he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
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