you mean i was at the winter classic?
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
I need a burrito and a hug.
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
just discovered a semi frightening wound on the side of my head that must have happened last night. if i die of a brain aneurysm, make sure they put "sorry for partying" on my gravestone.
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
Randomize
