Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
You pole danced in your parka.
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
as a side note pls kill me
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
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