..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
they're like a gay fantastic four
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
So the revenge porn my ex posted just resulted in a contract with a gay porn company. I'm going to make $8,000 this weekend. That would a breakup checkmate. Are you joining me in the legislative committee hearing tomorrow?
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
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