is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
Drunk enough that you donated $50 to taco bell, because they serve a great purpose.
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
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