Who wears a wallet chain?!
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
The couple that wants to take me home just paid the bartender $100 to pour tequila down my throat. I think I'm in some type of twilight zone where stds run rampant and the alcohol floweth
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
So much Jack, so little girl.
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
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