why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
It's a pity Stephen Hawking can't do sarcasm.
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
SITTING NEXT TO A CIRCUS PERFORMER AT PLANNED PARENTHOOD. THIS IS MY LIFE.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
Randomize
