I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
Randomize
