Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
Its about making memories worth repressing
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
An outback commercial just played and I remembered that guy from Australia Imade out with at the Derby. Great Bachelorette Party, btw.
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
Randomize
