Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
I woke up to ritz crackers on the lawn, a keystone behind the hedge and puke on the rental car... i think that we have become that house...
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
You called me at 4am shouting drunk shit about Poland and asking me to 'come out and play.' Where the fuck were you?
Poland
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
Randomize
