I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
This Asian instant coffee I found in ur kitchen is like crack. Who knew I could feel my heart beating in my asshole after one cup of this happiness.
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
I had a threesome with my hot neighbor and his GF and by threesome I mean I heard them getting it on in their apartment and I was in my apartment with a vibrator
and I may have moaned his name loud enough that they heard me because now he won’t make eye contact
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