Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
Cover your peen. We're going out.
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
Randomize
