i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
listening to happy ending by mika while imagining him to run after me at an aiport in slow motion... also, dipping oreos in baileys. not taking this breakup well. at. all.
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
Randomize
