You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
I just had the polyamorous Canadian hockey player do the splits while naked in a handstand at my apartment just now. And yes, I know it’s 1:30am on a Thursday.
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