can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
Marking my student's "don't do drugs" posters while simultaneously texting my dealer, is this what being a grown up is like?
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
I am not exagerating when I say the thought "screw you future me" actually just went through my head
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
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