yeah well we're currently on the phone and she's telling me about how much she misses me and all this shit and i muted myself and i'm watching porn.
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
You were trust falling into bushes
A good example of deductive reasoning: Knowing that when my girlfriend texts me "I promise not to smoke all your weed!" that she is...at that VERY moment...Smoking All Of My Weed.
Randomize
