Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
Got drunkdialed by my estranged mom while wallowing in pinkeye drinking 100 proof eating ramen alone. Year summed up perfectly.
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
Randomize
