Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
i caught a guy at work today stealing condoms. i let him go when i realized that they were extra small.
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
Randomize
