And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
Randomize
