did you get engaged???
Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
Randomize