Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
Randomize
