she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
When your grandma invites you to a sweet girls' Valentine's dinner with your mom and sister, but you have to decline because you're trying to get two dudes to rail you at once...
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
Randomize