did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
Nothing says “I spent too much in Vegas” quite like eating a jar of pickles for dinner and planning on cream of celery soup for breakfast tomorrow.
Randomize
