Really stoned
just sent my roommate on a cheese run
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
A young (I'm going to guess late middle school age) kid shouted at me from the crosswalk GAS PUMP OF SHAME! I have peaked in life.
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
Randomize
