Your date looks like the Cloverfield monster. good luck.
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
Randomize
