I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
I know its time to do laundry... i cant even find a dirty sock to wear because they all have jizz in them
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
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