Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
Times have changed. Freshman year I could throw my shirt in a bonfire and still get laid. Now when I puke in my girlfriend's bed on her birthday I'm "an asshole"
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
Hey
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GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
Randomize
