He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
there was a trapeze. enough said
so my aunt is sitting on the couch, eating a brownie and watching the biggest loser saying how it's not that hard to eat healthy
man i love america
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
did i walk over a car last night?
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
I made it to work. Still drunk. Definitely pregnant.
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
Hey. You dropped and smashed your road beer in my store last night. Again. And this time you didn't even order anything. You just walked in, yelled "SWEDISH STYLE!" Then lost your beer, looked depressed, and left.
When i was leaving for work this morning, i realized the neighbor was passed out drunk, with no pants, and a half eaten whopper on my lawn. Knowing that hey..we have all been there before.. i decided to give him a pillow and a blanket rather than wake him up.
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
Randomize
