I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
You were so drunk that you were trying to take pictures of a MILF at the park so you could send them to Adam, but you didn't want to "seem creepy," so you used taking pictures of her son as a cover. Needless to say, cops were called.
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
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