...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
is there anything more depressing than unpacking condoms from your suitcase that you thought you were going to use on vacation?
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
Randomize
