His uber religious wife caught us having anal sex in their bed..... she called us sodomites. Can you even be a sodomite if you're a girl?
You're not a sodomite. You're a whore. Tell her to get the insults right. Did she try to save you with Jesus?
She said she'd pray for me. Man, if I had just caught my husband balls deep in some ho, I'd say fuck the praying and kick her ass.
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
The typical response to someone smacking their vodka soaked hand on your face is not to put your face in their crotch
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
Randomize
