Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
one two three fourrrrnication!
Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
i just fell asleep masturbating. I'm no longer surprised i'm single. I can't even pleasure myself.
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
Sober January is a disaster.
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
My mind's like "He's a sexist pig" but my uterus is like "YOU SHALL BEAR HIM STRONG CHILDREN"
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
Randomize
