he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
Just remember I’m your roommate with extremely questionable morals
Exactly, what could possibly go wrong
Randomize
