We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
Randomize
