it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
it wasn't lemon gatorade
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
what you doin?
I just woke up vomited poured myself a chocolate milk and turned on the peoples court. you?
reread what you just wrote and reconsider your entire life
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
We have so much sex to catch up on
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
Randomize
