Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
It's a pity Stephen Hawking can't do sarcasm.
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
Randomize
