just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
you told the cab driver to stop being such a pussy because he wouldn't let you shotgun a beer in the backseat
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
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