people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
Just found out that the guy I lost my virginity to voted for Gary Johnson. It's almost more upsetting then him ending up being a massive asshole.
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
Randomize
