my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
It's 6 am and I've spent the last few hours searching for a cork screw or suitable substitute. You had none. Incidentally, I finally opened this bottle of wine, but owe you a new meat sticky thing with those two prongs. Sobriety is not good for me. Or your utensils.
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Randomize
