needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
Intelligence report: the hot sister called you gross, the sweet sister says you're dumb, and the smart sister says all the other men she knows would have to die for her to hook up with you.
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