Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
I was asking the bouncer, "if I fall will you catch me?" which then turned into "if I jump off the roof will you catch me?" He said no.
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
Randomize
