What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
Definitely need to find a less healthy bootycalls. All this bitch got in her fridge is feta, English muffins and wheat grass. What the fuck can I make with that???
Found 2 Coors, problem solved.
Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Randomize
