Just saw my boss eat a banana in three bites.
atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
Randomize
